Momma Bear

I felt the first tinge of the "Momma Bear" feeling yesterday. It was Gabriella's 2 month appointment - which unfortunately meant shots. I knew they were coming, but we got such good news about how healthy she is - it wasn't on the top of my mind. Gabby is 11 lbs, 4 oz - up from 7 lbs, 8 oz a month ago! She jumped from the 25th percentile to the 60th! :) She is 23" long - which is the 75th percentile. Her foot is a getting better every day and shouldn't need any casting. The doctor gave her thumbs up and then came the worst moment of my 26 and a half years of life. The nurse came in and did her job - which unfortunately meant giving Gabby two shots in one leg and one in the other. It took about 5 seconds for it to register that those shots hurt but when she figured it out, she cried the most heart wrenching cry I have ever heard. It was absolutely awful. It was all I could do to not push the nurse out of the way. When I finally got to hold her, she was sobbing (and so was I...). I held her as close as I could. She settled down and slept for awhile on the way home. When we got there, as long as I held her, she was alright. I put her in the swing for awhile...she slept for an hour or so...When it came time for Ean to leave for class, it was like the floodgates opened. She cried even harder than she did at the doctor's office! It literally...LITERALLY made me feel the most helpless I have EVER felt in my whole life. I would have given the beating heart from my chest - the breath from my lungs - to take the pain from that little girl. It was absolutely the worst feeling I have ever experienced. I held her as close as possible and we just sat in the nursery, rocking, both sobbing....It was awful. I gave her some ibuprofen and about 25 minutes later, she finally fell asleep. But every time I stopped rocking, she would whimper...I would squeeze her and rock and she would drift off to sleep. I'll tell you what...As horrible as that experience was, it made me feel even closer to my baby girl. She is absolutely the most amazing baby in the entire world. We have been blessed far beyond measure and I am so grateful to our amazing God for this beautiful baby girl.